The hypocrisy of McFly's new album - not young, not dumb, no thrills.


The time has come. 

McFly are BACK BACK BACK again with a new album. Their first studio album in 10 years. Young Dumb Thrills. 

McFly, back on their bullshit. 

According to the i, it got 2 stars and was said to "not be profound." Yikes. 

Now, this is coming from a fan. This is coming from someone who when I was around 12 or 13 said to myself I would get this tattooed on my wrist to show how much I loved and adored this band: 

I never got the tattoo but my love for the band remained fierce throughout my teenage years. I had my fair share of taunts about how McFly were 'gay,' or 'gayboys,' (Meant to mean bad, in early noughties insult language). I brushed it off, because I loved them and that was that. Their music spoke to my soul. 

Songs about falling in love with Uranus really got me, you know? 

Joking aside, the band is what really got me into music and through them, I managed to explore greener pastures and other genres. But it always came back to them. 

When they released their singles prior to the album, I was crestfallen. Happiness sounded like a George Ezra reject song. 

Growing Up was another one of those fucking songs where the singers in their thirties sing about a jaded adolescence. Stop doing that. Mark Hoppus jumped on the song, someone pushing fifty -- also singing about "not giving a f....". Don't get me wrong, Mark Hoppus is one of my favourite humans on the planet but it just puts a bad taste in my mouth when millionaires are singing about being unemployed because "they slept in." 

"So lets get in, get in the van" - what van? They'll tour right enough but they'll be on luxury buses. C'mon now, you're fooling no one here.  The song just really rubs me the wrong way and songs like it do it too. 

Then there's Tonight Is The Night -- now I can't take this one seriously because of a John Mulaney bit. 

"Cause all the new songs are about how 'tonight is the night' and 'we only have tonight.' That's the message in 90 percent of songs. That's such 19 year old garbage."

You heard it here! 19-year-old garbage. Written by real adult men. 

The rest of the album doesn't get any better. 

It sucks, it really sucks, because I didn't have high hopes perse, but I had hopes. They were my favourite band that I grew up on when I was younger, and I was hoping they had matured so that at 24 year old me would enjoy it too. 

It's... just.... bad. 

It feels like they're trying to play catch up to pop music now. I had seen some people saying that they hear 1975 vibes. That I get -- but it doesn't make sense for McFly. 

Happiness, despite what I said, is a solid opener. 

Another Song About Love is self-aware -- it's another song about love because what else are they going to write about? They're all either married or in relationships (Dougie isn't married but he's 32 and in a relationship with a 24-year-old model, also a 24-year-old that isn't me, I'm not mad. Nope.)  It's pretty stale. We get it. 

You're Not Special flips positivity on its head. We're not special because everybody dies like you. Dark stuff, boys. It's irrevocably upbeat and poppy that it's kind of annoying. 

But the most annoying of all comes in the form of Head Up. It's no secret that the McFly boys have written for One Direction which, you know, worked because it was pop stars writing for mega pop stars. This sounds like a run off - or an attempt at writing a One Direction track. Immediately as the song starts I get cringe shivers. "I get one love to keep my head up," repeats in the chorus and it's nauseating. It sounds like they should be doing a choreographed dance to it.  Please, just make it stop. Jesus God. 

Tonight is the Night we've been through. It's promising at the start - it's ironically probably the best song on the album. No doubt a Tom song. But when the chorus bursts in -  I just laugh. EVERY SONG IS ABOUT TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT AND HOW WE ONLY HAVE TONIGHT. Oh John Mulaney, how you can ruin a song for me like this? It's uptempo and rhythmically good. Very Beatles-esque. I'll take it. 

Then comes the dreaded song with RAT BOY. This is their attempt at being young by working with a 24-year-old. What's with this band and 24-year-olds in particular? Anyway. It's a throwaway track. Only Danny jumps on to say the buzzwords of Young Dumb Thrills and that's about the gist of the song around RAT BOY's verses. 

Mad About You is another love song, I think? It's getting to the point where I just want this journey of an album to be over. It's another filler about love. We get it. You guys are mad about someone. Cool. 

Now Sink or Sing is interesting. It starts off with a guitar and Danny Jones' vocals - promising. It sounds like something that could come from his solo stuff, not amiss from his EP charmingly entitled EP. It doesn't sound like a McFly song at all. I could stretch and say it harkens back to songs like She Falls Asleep, Bubblewrap, or That's the Truth. 

After that is Like I Can. It's another song about love. It's a carbon copy of the other songs about love, but with different words. It's saccharine dribble at this point. 

Now here's the kicker. Wild and Young. WILD AND YOUNG. Another song about being young but TWIST it's also about love. It's extremely repetitive. 

The last song you'd think would be one of the best. Save the best for last, please god. With Not The End, instead, I am accosted with high octave singing styles that follow a lengthy introduction. It's sparkly. Heavy on the drums and twinkles. I only make it to halfway through the song when I have to turn it off. It's too much.

What happened to my favourite band?

They've not matured, they've not tried to reinvent themselves the way Busted did, they've just... floundered. They're the product of a pop machine and it's like they got back inside it and got stuck. There's no bangers, there's no heart, it's just pretty... bleak. It's background music, if that.

It's safe to say |'m very disappointed. What happened to you, McFly? Who hurt you?

Meanwhile I'm going to go cry over Wonderland, which is the undisputed best work by these four men. 


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